“When you're young, you don't know what you don't know, so it's easier to get into that magical thing.”… Remember how magical the Holiday season was as a child and how our imaginations took hold of the rope of life to create moments when anything was possible? Why is it that when we ‘grow up’, we stop ‘believing’ that something greater than us can make our dreams come true?
As a kid growing up, I remember how incredibly magical each day was. The school year lasted decades upon decades, and summer vacation somehow seemed to last forever as well. Time had no meaning, and things like the Holidays were a really big deal. All year long, in the back of my mind was the fact that Santa was always watching and that I ought to behave myself. Of course, being a kid, I didn’t always follow this philosophy to the best of my ability, but when I messed up, I immediately felt reprimanded in that I knew Santa would NEVER approve. Originally from Erie, PA, the Holiday Season began as soon as it started to snow, and by Christmas, there was always enough snow to go around and enough to make you despise the stuff. All else aside, it was also absolutely magical as it meant that a whole wide YEAR of waiting was going to pay off for that one day of the impossible made possible.
Getting ready to leave to go to my Grandparents house overnight on Christmas Eve, we would meticulously set out cookies and milk and wouldn’t even take into consideration that Santa might possibly be really, really full and bloated from eating the other millions and trajillions of cookies laid out for him. Or even that he may be lactose intolerant, as a good percentage of the world today has some sort of intolerance to dairy. Nope! None of this mattered. Why? Because as children we don’t think about those technicalities. All that was ever taken into consideration was the small world we knew and lived in and there were no second thoughts or oppositions to behold. The magic of the season arose not only in the array of gifts under the tree, but also in the belief that something bigger than the stretch of the imagination existed and we didn’t have to see it to believe it. We just KNEW. And sure enough, every year at Christmas, the excitement and anticipation would build up to mass exhilaration and our world as we knew it was encompassed and embellished by the ‘impossible’.
I remember coming home Christmas Day each year and stepping foot into my house. I would always get goosebumps and a blood pressure spike on the never-ending walk to the living room. Although I knew (I just knew!) that the gifts were going to be placed beautifully and artfully under the tree, it was the climax of an entire year of built-up belief and pure imagination that sent me into a full-on frenzy. With my brother and sisters in toe, we would all creep over to the living room and slowly look around the corner to see what we had been waiting for all YEAR! It was so exciting, in fact, that none of us would actually be the first ones to walk into the living room. It was as if the magic made a secret aura around the room, and we needed permission to walk into it. The pure intensity of such a stimulating moment always made my mouth ache at the sides from smiling so big, but I didn’t care, and even if I did… I still couldn’t stop smiling. And, wait! The cookies! Did he eat them? Being the little, caring girl I was, I just knew that he would be super hungry after traveling in that snow. The long drives in the snow made ME hungry, so, naturally, I just knew that Santa would be just famished after his own travels. Plus, he was a pretty big guy, and he just LOOKED hungry. Each year, I was always so happy to see that Santa did, indeed, like the cookies and I assumed that he must have snacked while bringing in the presents through the front door. We didn’t have a chimney, so he (again, naturally!) had to use the door like everyone else. Christmas Day was almost too much to handle sometimes and the magic would last for weeks on end after each year’s celebration. Once those few weeks were over, absorbed and fully cherished, it was time to start gearing up for next year. The ‘impossible’ was real and my belief in something I didn't have to see drove me to see each element of my life in a new light. I didn't have to see Santa to 'know' that he was real, nor did I care to see him. The belief I instilled into his being was enough to influence me for the rest of those years and to consider my actions (...or at least consider them AFTER I had committed the crime), and to take my future into an account without question. In essence, a child's belief is actually quite wise to an extent as it creates a foundation for dreams. It creates wonderment and the curiosity to explore things beyond anything they can hold, touch or prove in a tangible sense. A child doesn't need to know something exists by simply seeing it. They 'see' things by believing in them and the rest creates itself. Imagine if we all were able to take even a little bit of this amusement and wonderment without question with us into 'adult'hood. What would your world consist of?
Think about this… If money, other people, and time weren’t objective, what would you aspire to do? What would change about the beliefs you have right now and your perception of life? Take a moment, close your eyes and just envision something you have always viewed as ‘impossible’. Imagine what it would feel like to you if you were to aspire to meet this unimaginable endeavor.
1. How would your life change or be different?
2. What would improve or worsen?
3. What would you have to sacrifice to get there?
4. What is the worst thing that could happen on your journey and what steps could you take to prevent this from happening?
5. How would your feelings about yourself and/or your life change?
6. What is holding you back?
Really take in your answers. This is just a taste of what you could have if you believed it was really a possibility and if you are willing to commit to admit to these answers. When you are timid to believe in not ‘seeing’ the end result with your eyes, sometimes having it written in front of you serves as that tangible evidence needed to ease the mind and heart. Not everything in life is as it seems and we often precipitate things to be UNbelievable when, in fact, our only culprit is most often ourselves. By knowing the risks involved in accomplishing anything, we tend to sit back and instill our belief into Life making things happen for us. Life can open up the door for us, but WE are the only ones who can walk through it. If you don’t open your eyes to believing the door is in front of you, you will sit and wait for something to happen that never will. What we fail to realize is that it’s not what we ‘see’ with our own eyes that holds our aspirations. Rather, it’s our dreams and our belief in our dreams that propels us to actually accomplish them. Live for your dreams without second-guessing the consequences. Your heart and subconscious already know the answers. Believe in yourself and believe that you deserve to be happy in your life. Keep your goals close to your heart and incorporate the things you do daily to support your ambitions. Why should the Holidays only come once a year?
Return to a day when you were a child at Christmas or another special time, and just encompass and feel the magic of the moment. Believe in yourself and let your mind wander to explore the things you never thought possible. Let yourself be inspired by the thought and feeling and allow your actions to follow close behind. Maybe believing in Santa isn’t so unbelievable after all…
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe.”
-Anatole France
"Don't let go of your dreams. If you have determination and belief in your dreams, you will succeed in spite of your desire to let go."
-Catherine Pulsifer
“Some things have to be believed to be seen.”
-Ralph Hodgson
Showing posts with label Inspiration. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Inspiration. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 21, 2009
"The Performance of a Lifetime"
I stood there, staring ahead without blinking as my heart pulsated through my chest and into the overwhelming silence. Taking a deep breath and savoring it, time ceased to exist as my gaze traveled from the space below to straight ahead where the plush fabric of the curtain stood only feet in front of me. Raising my chin just a little bit higher, the moment departed in slow motion as the curtains opened, slowly revealing the vivid spotlight and my stomach filled with wild butterflies. This was it…
For many years of my life, a big passion of mine was in the performing arts. Having been a singer ever since I can remember, my passion evolved into theatre, on a high school, community and collegiate level, singing the National Anthem at school and community events, voice lessons and writing and performing my own music, dancing to being a dance instructor, as well as being a former trumpet and guitar player. Music was something that gave me purpose and what I loved about it was that it didn’t have an ‘answer’ like most other subjects. No two people in the world will have identical views and preferences on music, and that’s the point. It allows you to be creative both mentally and physically and each performance is different than the last, even if it’s the same show played numerous times.
Dedicating countless hours to one show, song or dance, I always felt the biggest adrenaline rush in the world when the moment arrived to share the outcome of all those hours with other people. Being up on stage or in front of an audience was a challenge that kept me humble and very much so on my toes each day. After a performance, you suddenly don’t feel so afraid of anything life brings and the satisfactory ‘high’ after such an adrenaline rush would oftentimes last for weeks. Going into a production, you know you are going to be spending almost everyday of your time for at least a few months to ‘become’ the part you need to play. Each person on set or in a number has a specific objective to follow and obey and until each piece of the puzzle flows together, there would never be an opening night nor would there be the actual show itself. Although each person involved has a different character, choreography, voice, personality, and wardrobe, it is only together that the show can go on and it takes the entire cast to make it appear flawless. One of my favorite parts of performing was the relationships you would take with you in the end. After spending so much time working together towards a common goal for so many countless hours to successfully pull off what you have worked so hard for, you end up establishing a ‘trust’ in those people due to the heavy reliance on them pulling their weight.
Aside from making the actual production itself a success, the most challenging endeavor in performing in theatre is the initial audition to actually make the cut and have the opportunity to step on stage. Sometimes auditions in themselves can make or break a person down emotionally regardless of how well they do on stage. When you want anything bad enough there is a tremendous amount of pressure to do well and some people crack while others thrive. One of the things auditioning did was toughen me up for the real world of actual job interviews where I taught myself to look forward to the experience instead of fear it. One of the things we tend to forget sometimes is that the director or employer is (most of the time) just as nervous as we are. I mean think about it… Without great people to fill the empty shoes, there IS no play and there IS no business to be operated efficiently without employees. We put so much pressure on ourselves when we should be looking forward to having the opportunity to create the success the interviewer is striving for. Interviewing in itself is actually quite honoring when you really think about it. It’s a great challenge to attack in that you get one shot to make someone believe in you as much as you believe in yourself. But herein lies the problem… We don’t all believe in ourselves.
It may sound like an odd comparison, but as professionals in the health, wellness and fitness industry, aren’t we essentially ‘performing’ each day? Really take a moment to think about it… Each day and each person we come in contact with, we are playing a little piece of their puzzle. It is our job to be who they need us to be to help them reach their goals. If you aren’t able to be that person, they will ‘fire’ you and leave either to fear training or to find another trainer. We become both the director and the performer in our art of personal training and if we can’t adapt to different scripts, scenarios, personality types, situations, environments and conditions, our own production will never happen and the end product will cease to exist.
During an initial interview with a new client, essentially we are testing out the waters and seeing if we will be a good fit for our potential client and vice-versa. Your objective is to see if you can both work together efficiently and be compatible throughout a specific, or less structured duration of time to accomplish a final outcome or ‘production’, if you will. After establishing compatibility, you now have to build trust in each other over time and you, as the professional, have to be willing to guide the client in the right direction by following the script you have taken careful time to map out for them. We see the final outcome of our plans as we are the creators of it. We are able to visualize and express our expectations and teach the client how to get better at playing the new part of living a healthy lifestyle that they auditioned for and are trying to get used to. You, as the ‘director’, have to have confidence in your vision and have to be willing to guide the client into playing the part written for them. You have to carefully guide them into adjusting to their new part and you have to get them to believe they can become this person in order for the show to be authentic. They have to be able to convince themselves that this new roll of exercise and healthy living is right for them. If you aren’t able to teach them proper form, technique, habits, and about healthy living in general, they will remain and stand by their old habits and who they were before they walked into your realm. This is a very, very powerful role to possess and one that many people tend to take for granted more often than not. Think about the first time you ever stepped foot into a gym or your first soccer practice, or even the first time you went on stage. It is awkward to do something you have never done and it takes time to train your body and mind to accept, become familiarized and, most importantly, become comfortable with the lifestyle adjustment.
But you also, as the professional, get to do a little acting and performing yourself as your attitude, persistence and personality must blend fully to match your client and meet them halfway. One thing they don’t teach you in school no matter how many years and credits you obtain is how to actually interact with another person and make yourself fit the mold they need filled. Although YOU are the director, you also have to know how to treat each performer as everyone is different and everyone responds differently to different stimuli. This is why both music and fitness are forms of ART. There is no one answer to any equation or any one ‘right’ answer. If you sit in a room and ask 100 trainers the same question about what they would do to design a program for the same client, not a single one of them would deliver the same exact answer. Would it not be the same if you were to ask 100 musicians to write a song? Just like music, fitness is ever-changing and constantly evolving. If we stick to one idea or one belief forever without keeping up with the latest trends, we will never survive in being truly successful in our art. You need to expand your heart and mind to explore new horizons and accept change because if you don’t, you will be phased out of this industry immediately. Directors in film aren’t still using the same equipment or ‘technology’ that was used when film was first invented, musicians have evolved tremendously over time to create new sound, and YOU need to do the same if Success is to collaborate with you in the future. Having an open mind in the industry could mean the difference between the life or death of your career and regardless of if you ‘like’ doing something in particular, are biased to certain things, or just simply have personal preferences, you NEED to evolve with the changes happening around you and incorporate them into your art. Even though many ends have been tied up in the Land of Science, there is still so much ground to cover and so many discoveries to unfold before our eyes and if you happen to close your eyes and shut off your mind to acclimate to your surroundings, you will fall short of reaching your own goals and will have a challenging time working with people who are interested in the evolutions of fitness. There is no ‘one size fits all’ in any art form and there never will be. What your client wants is more important than what you ‘prefer’ to want to do or are biased towards. You must be WHO your client wants you to be and you must never forget that without THEM, you will never have a blockbuster, number one hit or career.
Perform your best each day on the job by always having more energy and enthusiasm than your client, even if you have been working nine hours in a row. When you are in session, you are playing the part of the ‘trainer’. You must play the part outstandingly each hour of your day and change yourself to fit the needs and wants of your client. You must script a new program for each person who crosses your path and you must take them by the hand and guide them to be the best performer they can be in the role they auditioned for. Don’t just play the part, BE the part. We are the directors and performers and must lead our industry TOGETHER to create the performance of a lifetime. Alone we are one piece of the play... Together we will change the world.
As the audience stood up and roared with searing applause, the curtains drew themselves to meet back in the middle of the stage where the vast illumination of the spotlight narrowed exponentially until the tiny sliver of light disappeared completely. I instantly drew in a deep breath as my stage ‘character’ flowed out of my body and mind on the exhale to return me to the present. As my client walked through the door smiling, I found myself smiling too, knowing I just gave the performance of a lifetime.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Act the part; walk and talk exactly as if you were already the person you want to be.”
-Brian Tracy
"When ever you don't feel like working hard, someone, somewhere else is, and when you meet them, they will have the edge."
-Unknown
“A theatre, a literature, an artistic expression that does not speak for its own time has no relevance.”
-Dario Fo
“The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it's dead for you.”
-Oscar Wilde
“I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”
-Albert Einstein
For many years of my life, a big passion of mine was in the performing arts. Having been a singer ever since I can remember, my passion evolved into theatre, on a high school, community and collegiate level, singing the National Anthem at school and community events, voice lessons and writing and performing my own music, dancing to being a dance instructor, as well as being a former trumpet and guitar player. Music was something that gave me purpose and what I loved about it was that it didn’t have an ‘answer’ like most other subjects. No two people in the world will have identical views and preferences on music, and that’s the point. It allows you to be creative both mentally and physically and each performance is different than the last, even if it’s the same show played numerous times.
Dedicating countless hours to one show, song or dance, I always felt the biggest adrenaline rush in the world when the moment arrived to share the outcome of all those hours with other people. Being up on stage or in front of an audience was a challenge that kept me humble and very much so on my toes each day. After a performance, you suddenly don’t feel so afraid of anything life brings and the satisfactory ‘high’ after such an adrenaline rush would oftentimes last for weeks. Going into a production, you know you are going to be spending almost everyday of your time for at least a few months to ‘become’ the part you need to play. Each person on set or in a number has a specific objective to follow and obey and until each piece of the puzzle flows together, there would never be an opening night nor would there be the actual show itself. Although each person involved has a different character, choreography, voice, personality, and wardrobe, it is only together that the show can go on and it takes the entire cast to make it appear flawless. One of my favorite parts of performing was the relationships you would take with you in the end. After spending so much time working together towards a common goal for so many countless hours to successfully pull off what you have worked so hard for, you end up establishing a ‘trust’ in those people due to the heavy reliance on them pulling their weight.
Aside from making the actual production itself a success, the most challenging endeavor in performing in theatre is the initial audition to actually make the cut and have the opportunity to step on stage. Sometimes auditions in themselves can make or break a person down emotionally regardless of how well they do on stage. When you want anything bad enough there is a tremendous amount of pressure to do well and some people crack while others thrive. One of the things auditioning did was toughen me up for the real world of actual job interviews where I taught myself to look forward to the experience instead of fear it. One of the things we tend to forget sometimes is that the director or employer is (most of the time) just as nervous as we are. I mean think about it… Without great people to fill the empty shoes, there IS no play and there IS no business to be operated efficiently without employees. We put so much pressure on ourselves when we should be looking forward to having the opportunity to create the success the interviewer is striving for. Interviewing in itself is actually quite honoring when you really think about it. It’s a great challenge to attack in that you get one shot to make someone believe in you as much as you believe in yourself. But herein lies the problem… We don’t all believe in ourselves.
It may sound like an odd comparison, but as professionals in the health, wellness and fitness industry, aren’t we essentially ‘performing’ each day? Really take a moment to think about it… Each day and each person we come in contact with, we are playing a little piece of their puzzle. It is our job to be who they need us to be to help them reach their goals. If you aren’t able to be that person, they will ‘fire’ you and leave either to fear training or to find another trainer. We become both the director and the performer in our art of personal training and if we can’t adapt to different scripts, scenarios, personality types, situations, environments and conditions, our own production will never happen and the end product will cease to exist.
During an initial interview with a new client, essentially we are testing out the waters and seeing if we will be a good fit for our potential client and vice-versa. Your objective is to see if you can both work together efficiently and be compatible throughout a specific, or less structured duration of time to accomplish a final outcome or ‘production’, if you will. After establishing compatibility, you now have to build trust in each other over time and you, as the professional, have to be willing to guide the client in the right direction by following the script you have taken careful time to map out for them. We see the final outcome of our plans as we are the creators of it. We are able to visualize and express our expectations and teach the client how to get better at playing the new part of living a healthy lifestyle that they auditioned for and are trying to get used to. You, as the ‘director’, have to have confidence in your vision and have to be willing to guide the client into playing the part written for them. You have to carefully guide them into adjusting to their new part and you have to get them to believe they can become this person in order for the show to be authentic. They have to be able to convince themselves that this new roll of exercise and healthy living is right for them. If you aren’t able to teach them proper form, technique, habits, and about healthy living in general, they will remain and stand by their old habits and who they were before they walked into your realm. This is a very, very powerful role to possess and one that many people tend to take for granted more often than not. Think about the first time you ever stepped foot into a gym or your first soccer practice, or even the first time you went on stage. It is awkward to do something you have never done and it takes time to train your body and mind to accept, become familiarized and, most importantly, become comfortable with the lifestyle adjustment.
But you also, as the professional, get to do a little acting and performing yourself as your attitude, persistence and personality must blend fully to match your client and meet them halfway. One thing they don’t teach you in school no matter how many years and credits you obtain is how to actually interact with another person and make yourself fit the mold they need filled. Although YOU are the director, you also have to know how to treat each performer as everyone is different and everyone responds differently to different stimuli. This is why both music and fitness are forms of ART. There is no one answer to any equation or any one ‘right’ answer. If you sit in a room and ask 100 trainers the same question about what they would do to design a program for the same client, not a single one of them would deliver the same exact answer. Would it not be the same if you were to ask 100 musicians to write a song? Just like music, fitness is ever-changing and constantly evolving. If we stick to one idea or one belief forever without keeping up with the latest trends, we will never survive in being truly successful in our art. You need to expand your heart and mind to explore new horizons and accept change because if you don’t, you will be phased out of this industry immediately. Directors in film aren’t still using the same equipment or ‘technology’ that was used when film was first invented, musicians have evolved tremendously over time to create new sound, and YOU need to do the same if Success is to collaborate with you in the future. Having an open mind in the industry could mean the difference between the life or death of your career and regardless of if you ‘like’ doing something in particular, are biased to certain things, or just simply have personal preferences, you NEED to evolve with the changes happening around you and incorporate them into your art. Even though many ends have been tied up in the Land of Science, there is still so much ground to cover and so many discoveries to unfold before our eyes and if you happen to close your eyes and shut off your mind to acclimate to your surroundings, you will fall short of reaching your own goals and will have a challenging time working with people who are interested in the evolutions of fitness. There is no ‘one size fits all’ in any art form and there never will be. What your client wants is more important than what you ‘prefer’ to want to do or are biased towards. You must be WHO your client wants you to be and you must never forget that without THEM, you will never have a blockbuster, number one hit or career.
Perform your best each day on the job by always having more energy and enthusiasm than your client, even if you have been working nine hours in a row. When you are in session, you are playing the part of the ‘trainer’. You must play the part outstandingly each hour of your day and change yourself to fit the needs and wants of your client. You must script a new program for each person who crosses your path and you must take them by the hand and guide them to be the best performer they can be in the role they auditioned for. Don’t just play the part, BE the part. We are the directors and performers and must lead our industry TOGETHER to create the performance of a lifetime. Alone we are one piece of the play... Together we will change the world.
As the audience stood up and roared with searing applause, the curtains drew themselves to meet back in the middle of the stage where the vast illumination of the spotlight narrowed exponentially until the tiny sliver of light disappeared completely. I instantly drew in a deep breath as my stage ‘character’ flowed out of my body and mind on the exhale to return me to the present. As my client walked through the door smiling, I found myself smiling too, knowing I just gave the performance of a lifetime.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Act the part; walk and talk exactly as if you were already the person you want to be.”
-Brian Tracy
"When ever you don't feel like working hard, someone, somewhere else is, and when you meet them, they will have the edge."
-Unknown
“A theatre, a literature, an artistic expression that does not speak for its own time has no relevance.”
-Dario Fo
“The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it's dead for you.”
-Oscar Wilde
“I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.”
-Albert Einstein
Monday, December 14, 2009
Being Vulnerable to Vulnerability
“GOOOOODMORNING!!! One morrrre dayyyy!!!”… This is the sound on my voicemail at exactly 5:30 in the morning from my best friend in Kansas City, Casey Arnold, who just couldn’t wait to tell me how excited she was to fly in for the next week to work Boot Camp at the Professional Fitness Institute… What are friends for, right?
Living in Las Vegas for a lot of people can be extremely overwhelming and, at times, way too much fun. It’s a huge city where anything goes, and where you really have to accept that you will be exposed to just about everything and anything, regardless of whether or not you go out of your way for it. It is a land of opportunity as it is a city that thrives off trends and in always making things bigger, better, faster and stronger than the rest of the world. Because of the magnitude and charade of people and places here, many people can’t resist Vegas’s many temptations and from one extreme to the next, it truly isn’t a place for the faint at heart.
I feel fortunate to be in an industry where it hasn’t been too much of a struggle to find those individuals in the area who truly have the world’s best intentions at heart. Although my own intentions for moving out to Vegas were work and opportunity related, living in a big city is a new experience for me and I know that it can at times be extremely discouraging trying to find like-minded individuals who share your same morals and who you can develop a lasting relationship with when you know absolutely nothing about them going in. Upon first moving to Las Vegas, I had known a select few individuals whom I had connected with previously and was very content in knowing because they were people whom I had learned to greatly respect, look up to, and appreciate more than words can explain. Since the actual move itself, I have been incredibly blessed to meet and work with some of the most amazing professionals in the industry and some of the most humble and big-hearted people imaginable who are always doing everything under the sun for everyone around them… myself included.
Each month, I have the great opportunity to devote almost an entire week to instructing Boot Camp at the Professional Fitness Institute where working over 80 hours in 6 days is completely normal and you get to spend each of these days submerged in a different experience each time with different people. Although each Boot Camp is a new adventure to behold and relish, the one thing that remains constant is spending each of these hours and days with my ‘family’ of best friends, who also do a great job posing as co-workers. Each day of Boot Camp, it is our job to work together to find a way to make sure each of these crazy days goes according to plan and to always be there to back each other up and to push each other forward. Although it is the student’s time to shine, it is a big part of our job to help show them the light. I remember the first time meeting each of my co-workers and I remember how challenging it was at first to become accustomed to working such long days so many days in a row and in getting used to working so closely with people whom I was still getting to know. I remember fighting with fatigue (although this still happens on occasion!), and I remember the first time I ever gave a lecture in front of a group of our students. Most importantly, I remember the people who were there to back me up through each hardship, accomplishment, and experience, and whose presence has helped me to become a better person. Without these individuals who were and still are willing to open their hearts and arms to me, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
When you are working so closely with people so many hours of the day, you really have no room to hide any flaws. You can’t go home during the day to shake off a trouble or a ‘bad’ day, you have to stick it out and find ways to brush it off and deal with it after you are off the clock. Being vulnerable is something that puts everyone out of their comfort zone, and vulnerability is one of the most difficult things to share with people as it makes you susceptible to ‘weakness’. What we often don’t realize, however, is that our natural strengths aren’t always what make us ‘strong’, and that oftentimes it is in overcoming our ‘weaknesses’ that create the strength we can use to grow as individuals. Strength can only be found in any facet in life through an ‘obstacle’ or a challenge. One isn’t born strong, but gains strength through experience, hardships, overcoming negativity or a negative situation and in facing Fear head-on. This is also a great test of the strength of a friendship or relationship as only those who truly have your best intentions in mind will be there to catch you when you fall and help guide you back on your toes. So often we believe it is the opposite and that vulnerability makes us ‘weak’, but it’s really amazing what you can find out about yourself and others when something less than desirable happens in life. Working with these incredible individuals has truly taught me the value of true friendship and the true meanings of encouragement, support, motivation and how important it is to surround yourself with the right people when you are making transitions and attempting to grow as a person in any way, shape or form.
As each month goes on, I get more and more eager to work with and spend time with my ‘family’ of Professional Trainers, and the days don’t seem quite as long when you are around those people you love and when you know you are doing something to progress not just yourself and your own endeavors, but when you are making a difference in the lives of other people as well. Although I am a work in progress and am no where near where my aspirations lie, I have grown so much over a short period simply by being around the people who have helped guide me in my journey to help me reach and accomplish my goals and who have been there for me in the midst of all the hardships, troubles, joys, triumphs and successions I have gone through. And they have done it earnestly and without judgment or bias.
One of the things we have to remember as trainers and healthcare professionals and providers is that each of our clients are going to be coming to us with less-than-greater belief in themselves or in their competence in accomplishing their goals. If they felt satisfied or that they could accomplish their goals on their own, they wouldn’t have any desire to seek you and/or your services. The fact that they even step one foot into a facility to get help speaks volumes already regarding the fact that whatever they are doing outside of your doors just isn’t working. Admitting vulnerability isn’t something people typically do naturally unless provoked by something in their lives and it is especially rare for someone to openly admit vulnerability to a complete stranger, which is essentially what each potential client is doing when taking that step into a new facility or environment. We have to look at these situations and revert back to a time when we, ourselves, had to step into an unknown situation and be fostered by gaining experience and guidance through vulnerability. As a plant cannot grow without water, we cannot grow either personally or professionally by standing still. Our clients are no different in this way. We all had to start where we were standing in each of our own life’s endeavors and without putting one foot in front of the other, we would never have gotten from point A to point B by any stretch of the imagination. We have to put ourselves out there and reach out to receive the guidance of someone or something else, whether it’s through someone directly in front of you or through other viable resources you have access to in regards to your chosen venture. As human beings, we naturally gravitate towards making great first impressions and in showing ourselves in our greatest light when meeting someone for the first time. Our clients will be coming to us many times broken down, frustrated, depressed, sick, unhealthy, unmotivated, lacking confidence, and the list goes on. They are going to be feeling their worst and they are going to be afraid and fearful of where they are now, who they may be now, and where the road ahead may take them. We have to be willing to lift them up to help them find and discover their inner strength, beauty and confidence and help them to find their path to greatness to be the best they can be. You ARE their motivation, their savior, their inspiration, their leader, their therapist and their friend and confident.
Moving was, and still is, a humbling experience to me because it forced me out of my comfort zone and to admit that I needed help. Reaching out to people 3,000 miles cross-country was at times really difficult, but I was able to step my foot into the right doors to let the right people know that I really needed them to help me.
One of the other things my move humbled me to was the two extremes of being completely terrified and being completely excited to begin a new life. On one hand, it was the most excitement I had ever felt as it was beyond intense to know I was uprooting everything I had come to know as ‘comfortable’ and ‘home’ to be somewhere completely foreign and far from where I was prior. On the other hand, because this was such a change and because it opposed everything I had known up until the moment I moved, it was equally terrifying venturing into the ‘unknown’. One of the things I had to realize quickly was that success is NOT comfortable. It’s not meant to be. If it were, there would be no holding one-self back from taking risks, and more people would be taking action. This, however, isn’t the case, because it’s not our natural and desirable state to strive to be uncomfortable. We are creatures of habit, routine and COMFORT and we naturally fear stepping out of the box. Success isn’t easy and you will fall more times than you find yourself standing, however, the outcome for perseverance is always, always success and all it takes is that ONE single time for all the pieces to fall into place and for all the stars to align themselves. Our clients and patients will be experiencing the same things. They are stepping into OUR comfort zone and out of their own. They are taking a risk and are excited and terrified all at once. Making-over your life isn’t something that happens overnight and the thought of hard work over a lifetime can, in itself, be pretty intimidating at times. We must never forget our own struggles and should use these experiences to humble ourselves into understanding and empathizing with those who are at a crossroad and who are teetering on both extremes of excitement and terror. Never allow yourself to get too comfortable yourself. Step into the shoes of people in all walks of life and let them know you are there for them and not against them. Compassion, understanding, belief, motivation and support are KEY to success in this industry. Help them to see the light and train them to keep their eye on it at all times. Starting from the bottom and working your way to the top is never an easy challenge to conquer.
Remember where you started and never forget where you began. Be humble and recognize the time to be vulnerable and to encourage and embrace vulnerability in both yourself and others. Your own success might depend on it.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint you can on it.”
- Danny Kaye
“Example sheds a genial ray which men are apt to borrow, so first improve yourself today, and then your friends tomorrow.”
-Anonymous
“The test we must set for ourselves is not to march alone but to march in such a way that others will wish to join us.”
- Hubert Humphrey, U.S. vice president, senator
“Change does not change tradition. It strengthens it. Change is a challenge and an opportunity; not a threat.”
-Prince Philip of England
"I understand now that the vulnerability I've always felt is the greatest strength a person can have. You can't experience life without feeling life. What I've learned is that being vulnerable to somebody you love is not a weakness, it's a strength."
-Elisabeth Shue
Living in Las Vegas for a lot of people can be extremely overwhelming and, at times, way too much fun. It’s a huge city where anything goes, and where you really have to accept that you will be exposed to just about everything and anything, regardless of whether or not you go out of your way for it. It is a land of opportunity as it is a city that thrives off trends and in always making things bigger, better, faster and stronger than the rest of the world. Because of the magnitude and charade of people and places here, many people can’t resist Vegas’s many temptations and from one extreme to the next, it truly isn’t a place for the faint at heart.
I feel fortunate to be in an industry where it hasn’t been too much of a struggle to find those individuals in the area who truly have the world’s best intentions at heart. Although my own intentions for moving out to Vegas were work and opportunity related, living in a big city is a new experience for me and I know that it can at times be extremely discouraging trying to find like-minded individuals who share your same morals and who you can develop a lasting relationship with when you know absolutely nothing about them going in. Upon first moving to Las Vegas, I had known a select few individuals whom I had connected with previously and was very content in knowing because they were people whom I had learned to greatly respect, look up to, and appreciate more than words can explain. Since the actual move itself, I have been incredibly blessed to meet and work with some of the most amazing professionals in the industry and some of the most humble and big-hearted people imaginable who are always doing everything under the sun for everyone around them… myself included.
Each month, I have the great opportunity to devote almost an entire week to instructing Boot Camp at the Professional Fitness Institute where working over 80 hours in 6 days is completely normal and you get to spend each of these days submerged in a different experience each time with different people. Although each Boot Camp is a new adventure to behold and relish, the one thing that remains constant is spending each of these hours and days with my ‘family’ of best friends, who also do a great job posing as co-workers. Each day of Boot Camp, it is our job to work together to find a way to make sure each of these crazy days goes according to plan and to always be there to back each other up and to push each other forward. Although it is the student’s time to shine, it is a big part of our job to help show them the light. I remember the first time meeting each of my co-workers and I remember how challenging it was at first to become accustomed to working such long days so many days in a row and in getting used to working so closely with people whom I was still getting to know. I remember fighting with fatigue (although this still happens on occasion!), and I remember the first time I ever gave a lecture in front of a group of our students. Most importantly, I remember the people who were there to back me up through each hardship, accomplishment, and experience, and whose presence has helped me to become a better person. Without these individuals who were and still are willing to open their hearts and arms to me, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
When you are working so closely with people so many hours of the day, you really have no room to hide any flaws. You can’t go home during the day to shake off a trouble or a ‘bad’ day, you have to stick it out and find ways to brush it off and deal with it after you are off the clock. Being vulnerable is something that puts everyone out of their comfort zone, and vulnerability is one of the most difficult things to share with people as it makes you susceptible to ‘weakness’. What we often don’t realize, however, is that our natural strengths aren’t always what make us ‘strong’, and that oftentimes it is in overcoming our ‘weaknesses’ that create the strength we can use to grow as individuals. Strength can only be found in any facet in life through an ‘obstacle’ or a challenge. One isn’t born strong, but gains strength through experience, hardships, overcoming negativity or a negative situation and in facing Fear head-on. This is also a great test of the strength of a friendship or relationship as only those who truly have your best intentions in mind will be there to catch you when you fall and help guide you back on your toes. So often we believe it is the opposite and that vulnerability makes us ‘weak’, but it’s really amazing what you can find out about yourself and others when something less than desirable happens in life. Working with these incredible individuals has truly taught me the value of true friendship and the true meanings of encouragement, support, motivation and how important it is to surround yourself with the right people when you are making transitions and attempting to grow as a person in any way, shape or form.
As each month goes on, I get more and more eager to work with and spend time with my ‘family’ of Professional Trainers, and the days don’t seem quite as long when you are around those people you love and when you know you are doing something to progress not just yourself and your own endeavors, but when you are making a difference in the lives of other people as well. Although I am a work in progress and am no where near where my aspirations lie, I have grown so much over a short period simply by being around the people who have helped guide me in my journey to help me reach and accomplish my goals and who have been there for me in the midst of all the hardships, troubles, joys, triumphs and successions I have gone through. And they have done it earnestly and without judgment or bias.
One of the things we have to remember as trainers and healthcare professionals and providers is that each of our clients are going to be coming to us with less-than-greater belief in themselves or in their competence in accomplishing their goals. If they felt satisfied or that they could accomplish their goals on their own, they wouldn’t have any desire to seek you and/or your services. The fact that they even step one foot into a facility to get help speaks volumes already regarding the fact that whatever they are doing outside of your doors just isn’t working. Admitting vulnerability isn’t something people typically do naturally unless provoked by something in their lives and it is especially rare for someone to openly admit vulnerability to a complete stranger, which is essentially what each potential client is doing when taking that step into a new facility or environment. We have to look at these situations and revert back to a time when we, ourselves, had to step into an unknown situation and be fostered by gaining experience and guidance through vulnerability. As a plant cannot grow without water, we cannot grow either personally or professionally by standing still. Our clients are no different in this way. We all had to start where we were standing in each of our own life’s endeavors and without putting one foot in front of the other, we would never have gotten from point A to point B by any stretch of the imagination. We have to put ourselves out there and reach out to receive the guidance of someone or something else, whether it’s through someone directly in front of you or through other viable resources you have access to in regards to your chosen venture. As human beings, we naturally gravitate towards making great first impressions and in showing ourselves in our greatest light when meeting someone for the first time. Our clients will be coming to us many times broken down, frustrated, depressed, sick, unhealthy, unmotivated, lacking confidence, and the list goes on. They are going to be feeling their worst and they are going to be afraid and fearful of where they are now, who they may be now, and where the road ahead may take them. We have to be willing to lift them up to help them find and discover their inner strength, beauty and confidence and help them to find their path to greatness to be the best they can be. You ARE their motivation, their savior, their inspiration, their leader, their therapist and their friend and confident.
Moving was, and still is, a humbling experience to me because it forced me out of my comfort zone and to admit that I needed help. Reaching out to people 3,000 miles cross-country was at times really difficult, but I was able to step my foot into the right doors to let the right people know that I really needed them to help me.
One of the other things my move humbled me to was the two extremes of being completely terrified and being completely excited to begin a new life. On one hand, it was the most excitement I had ever felt as it was beyond intense to know I was uprooting everything I had come to know as ‘comfortable’ and ‘home’ to be somewhere completely foreign and far from where I was prior. On the other hand, because this was such a change and because it opposed everything I had known up until the moment I moved, it was equally terrifying venturing into the ‘unknown’. One of the things I had to realize quickly was that success is NOT comfortable. It’s not meant to be. If it were, there would be no holding one-self back from taking risks, and more people would be taking action. This, however, isn’t the case, because it’s not our natural and desirable state to strive to be uncomfortable. We are creatures of habit, routine and COMFORT and we naturally fear stepping out of the box. Success isn’t easy and you will fall more times than you find yourself standing, however, the outcome for perseverance is always, always success and all it takes is that ONE single time for all the pieces to fall into place and for all the stars to align themselves. Our clients and patients will be experiencing the same things. They are stepping into OUR comfort zone and out of their own. They are taking a risk and are excited and terrified all at once. Making-over your life isn’t something that happens overnight and the thought of hard work over a lifetime can, in itself, be pretty intimidating at times. We must never forget our own struggles and should use these experiences to humble ourselves into understanding and empathizing with those who are at a crossroad and who are teetering on both extremes of excitement and terror. Never allow yourself to get too comfortable yourself. Step into the shoes of people in all walks of life and let them know you are there for them and not against them. Compassion, understanding, belief, motivation and support are KEY to success in this industry. Help them to see the light and train them to keep their eye on it at all times. Starting from the bottom and working your way to the top is never an easy challenge to conquer.
Remember where you started and never forget where you began. Be humble and recognize the time to be vulnerable and to encourage and embrace vulnerability in both yourself and others. Your own success might depend on it.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint you can on it.”
- Danny Kaye
“Example sheds a genial ray which men are apt to borrow, so first improve yourself today, and then your friends tomorrow.”
-Anonymous
“The test we must set for ourselves is not to march alone but to march in such a way that others will wish to join us.”
- Hubert Humphrey, U.S. vice president, senator
“Change does not change tradition. It strengthens it. Change is a challenge and an opportunity; not a threat.”
-Prince Philip of England
"I understand now that the vulnerability I've always felt is the greatest strength a person can have. You can't experience life without feeling life. What I've learned is that being vulnerable to somebody you love is not a weakness, it's a strength."
-Elisabeth Shue
Monday, October 5, 2009
You're Only As...?...As the Company You Keep
Batman. Superman. The President. Your teacher or ‘invisible’ friend. Michael Jordan. Your Mom. Your Dad, brother. Your sister… Who was your ideal role model growing up, and what qualities did they possess that inspired you? Better yet… How did you emulate that inspiration, with which you desired to become, to help foster the person you are today?
Being so heavily involved in an industry where your career rests not on the best way to benefit yourself, but how you can channel your gift of giving in lieu of helping and benefitting others, it is virtually impossible to not experience the greatest inspiration and gratitude each and every day. The honor of meeting so many amazing professionals who so selflessly profess such immense passion toward their dedication of giving all they can tender to make the lives of those around them a better place is enough to bring tears to your eyes. The immeasurable graciousness I have had the honor of observing each day has made it impossible to not desire to be a better person and to follow in their footsteps by reaching out to grasp as many desperate hands as possible. To say I am not exposed to many ‘role models’ would be an absolute lie, as I can easily say it is no accident that I have made the conscious decision, effort and choice to surround myself with those people whom I look up to and wish to emulate someday in my own life and career.
A difficult lesson to learn, where the solution is often easier said than done, is that we are only as good as the company we keep. Who we choose to surround ourselves with often says more about us to others than what we may actually be doing alone in our spare time. To put it in perspective, think about it for yourself… If you meet a person whom you think you’ll grow to enjoy, yet all the people they choose to associate with have bad intentions and aren’t the best influences, isn’t it natural to directly correlate those associations into your first impressions of this person? Would you not assume that maybe this person has similar attributes as the people they keep close? Hypothetically speaking, would you surround yourself with people who have qualities in which you didn’t stand by or believe in? Probably not, as you would be more apt to let those into your life-space who share similar beliefs and goals as yourself to enhance and compliment you and your life. With that said and done, is it not safe to assume that this correlation is no accident?
Let’s take it a step further in another example: Consider wanting to improve your skills in any given sport. What would benefit you more? Practicing with someone who plays worse than you, or with someone who is at least twice as good as you? The answer is obvious, right? Well, life isn’t much different when you step back and take in the big picture. When you surround yourself with people who strive for greatness, are at least twice as successful as you may be and who stand by the same beliefs, passions and goals as you, it can be easier to ultimately get to where you want to be in life. You will have an experienced pair of footsteps to follow in each day and, more often than not, you can take up extensive short-cuts through the words of wisdom given by these individuals to help get to your destination much more efficiently than having to learn the hard way. With the help of someone who has been in your shoes and who reached success, you have the opportunity to learn from these individuals the lessons they had to learn the hard way, or lessons passed down to them from THEIR mentors or role models. It is, essentially, one of the most valuable things you can do to get from point A to point B, and beyond. We always have to remember and keep in mind that there is truly no such thing as a self-made man. And those who think they can and will do it solely on their own will have an almost impossible journey to succumb to. Regardless of whether the influence of another human being was studied up close and personal by physically being around the person and having access to direct communication with them in this point in time, or whether the method used to learn was indirect and from afar through studying autobiographies, latest research, articles, books, TV appearances, magazines, interviews, etc. done with that person, you are still being ‘mentored’ from afar as you are basing your own experiences off this other individual’s present, past and future practices and experiences. Who better to learn from than those people who have been in your position and who understand what you are going through and what you WILL go through in the future? If you are still in disbelief about this fact, I want you to ask yourself how you went through each stage of life growing up… Did you really depend on no one to teach you how to say and write the alphabet? Who taught you how to ride your first two-wheeler? How did you learn the English language and how did you later pass chemistry? And of your talent playing the piano? What about how you want to raise your own children? You see; we live through life learning through others examples, experiences and words. It’s no mistake that this method has helped us get to where we are right now and that it will continue to help us grow in the future. We all have had inspiration to help us grow, and we have all had to depend on others in some fashion or degree to help get us there. With that said and done, is it no wonder that discontinuing this proven method would be foolish? When you get right down to it, this is something we have ALL proven effective and we can ALL attest that it works… So why stop now?
In my life everyday, I am always encouraging those around me to reach out and grasp the hands of those they look up to and those who are willing to help (and I am telling you… you will very, very rarely, if EVER, find an unwilling hand if you are genuine and stand by your good intentions and inquiries). Meeting good people and holding on to good people are two key things to aspire to do on a daily basis. I, for one, know I wouldn’t be in this exact moment right now had I not tried to reach out to the people I met and immediately looked up to. The greatest successes of my life so far I can dedicate to the many individuals who helped me to see to the ‘impossible’ and who raised the bar so I could fly higher. I always, always advocate this to those around me and will continue to do so for however long I am granted this amazing opportunity to help have an impact on the people I meet as I climb my own ladders, steps and pillars.
Just this past week, while talking with a co-worker about this very subject, I expressed my complete admiration for a world-renowned fitness, wellness and health professional that I have invested a great deal of time into studying over the course of my career who has had a tremendous impact on me as a professional without even knowing it. I went on and on about this admiration until she stopped me and said, “So… Have you contacted him to tell him this?”, and I completely stopped in my tracks. “No.” I said, and right then I had a really strange and inspiring epiphany that I hadn’t even thought of prior. Here I was advocating to everyone around me about reaching out and staying in contact with the people they admire most and I wasn’t even fully living my own example. Granted, the people I have personally met and reached out to I have stuck by like glue and I will continue to do so for the duration of my life and career, but what about the people you admire that you don’t have the convenience of meeting on a daily basis? How do you possibly connect with someone who seems as out of reach and up the chain as Spiderman himself? I thought to myself, “Is it possible that I am putting a limitation on myself with something that may be so seemingly simple to achieve?”… “Hmm… Where’s the loophole?”.
That night, I wrote my own role model a long message via internet expressing my admiration, my epiphany, and how delighted I would be to meet him if the opportunity could ever (even in the slightest) be possible. Sure enough, the very next day I received a gracious letter in return expressing many thanks, kind comments and a phone number to call since he doesn’t reside in Vegas. Wow. Words to begin a connection through conversation. I couldn’t (and still can’t) describe my excitement regarding the matter and how immensely uncomplicated it was to just simply reach out and, if nothing else, let somebody know how they have influenced you. Rarely will you find someone who isn’t happy to continue to make a greater difference than they have already. Almost always, the people who have gone to the top and beyond realized the point I am making in the article and acted on it. More often than not, these same people who received so much help will also be the first ones to continue following in their mentor’s shoes by helping others who look up to them.
Giving is a precious (and contagious) gift that tends to go full circle in the long run. If you fear taking the chance to reach out thinking you won’t get anywhere, try this thought on for size: In knowing no man is ‘self-made’ and that success breeds success through example, hard work, repetition and so forth, remember that your ‘idols’ have worked so hard to emulate their own idols, and therefore have seen the true value of what ‘giving’ can accomplish. This, in turn, will lead them to continue following the cycle originally led by the people they looked up to, and they will, therefore, be the first ones to take a step down to help you take a step up. It is such a simple concept that I believe we read into a little too much when the answer was already evident to begin with. What do you have to lose when reaching out and what’s the worst that could happen? As I always, always say and will continue to say: Don’t be afraid to try something new or to take a risk. We are given this one amazing life to live to the fullest and to live by being the best we can with what we have. We might not have everything or all the answers, but most of the time we can find someone or a few people who might be able to teach us a thing or two or at least guide us in the right direction to find what it is we are striving for. Life is too short as it is. If you can take a short-cut or two here and there, take advantage of the opportunity and give it back in return when the right time comes along.
One of the greatest benefits of surrounding yourself with the people you admire most, and people who have captured your attention in regards to where they are at in life, is the amazing prospect of learning something new each day. When you are encased in a circle of people who are at or below your level, you have no room to grow and no hopes to aspire to reach. You will never learn how to progress through the different stages of your career and you will never have a willing hand reaching down from above to grasp ahold of you and lift you higher. You will be just as successful as the company you keep.
In my short time here in Las Vegas, I have had the incredible opportunity of reaching out to so many wonderful and inspiring professionals from all over the Valley through working at a few different facilities around the city as well as through my work in Connect To Fitness. Each week, I am being introduced to some of the most awe-inspiring people I have ever had the honor of meeting and I can say without guilt and with complete honesty that the quality of my life has done nothing but improve by the day. When you are constantly encompassed by your dreams, goals and the people who are willing to bring you up past your ‘limitations’, your life as you know it will change immensely… for the better. Get out and strive to meet the people who will help You reach your quality of life, Faithful Reader, and see how rapidly the transformation begins!
In this one life, we are only given a short chance to make a change, a difference and an influence. Let those who inspire you lead you to your goals and aspirations through example and approach and follow them without fear or discontent. In a world where so many people need our help, is it no wonder we should willingly extend our hand to reach out and make the most of our time here together?
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Very few men are wise by their own counsel, or learned by their own teaching. For he that was only taught by himself had a fool for his master.” –Ben Johnson
“No matter how lofty you are in your department, the responsibility for what your lowliest assistant is doing is yours.” -Bessie Lowland James
“The most important single influence in the life of a person is another person... who is worthy of emulation.” -Paul D. Shafer
“I think it's an honor to be a role model to one person or maybe more than that. If you are given a chance to be a role model, I think you should always take it because you can influence a person's life in a positive light, and that's what I want to do. That's what it's all about.” –Tiger Woods
Being so heavily involved in an industry where your career rests not on the best way to benefit yourself, but how you can channel your gift of giving in lieu of helping and benefitting others, it is virtually impossible to not experience the greatest inspiration and gratitude each and every day. The honor of meeting so many amazing professionals who so selflessly profess such immense passion toward their dedication of giving all they can tender to make the lives of those around them a better place is enough to bring tears to your eyes. The immeasurable graciousness I have had the honor of observing each day has made it impossible to not desire to be a better person and to follow in their footsteps by reaching out to grasp as many desperate hands as possible. To say I am not exposed to many ‘role models’ would be an absolute lie, as I can easily say it is no accident that I have made the conscious decision, effort and choice to surround myself with those people whom I look up to and wish to emulate someday in my own life and career.
A difficult lesson to learn, where the solution is often easier said than done, is that we are only as good as the company we keep. Who we choose to surround ourselves with often says more about us to others than what we may actually be doing alone in our spare time. To put it in perspective, think about it for yourself… If you meet a person whom you think you’ll grow to enjoy, yet all the people they choose to associate with have bad intentions and aren’t the best influences, isn’t it natural to directly correlate those associations into your first impressions of this person? Would you not assume that maybe this person has similar attributes as the people they keep close? Hypothetically speaking, would you surround yourself with people who have qualities in which you didn’t stand by or believe in? Probably not, as you would be more apt to let those into your life-space who share similar beliefs and goals as yourself to enhance and compliment you and your life. With that said and done, is it not safe to assume that this correlation is no accident?
Let’s take it a step further in another example: Consider wanting to improve your skills in any given sport. What would benefit you more? Practicing with someone who plays worse than you, or with someone who is at least twice as good as you? The answer is obvious, right? Well, life isn’t much different when you step back and take in the big picture. When you surround yourself with people who strive for greatness, are at least twice as successful as you may be and who stand by the same beliefs, passions and goals as you, it can be easier to ultimately get to where you want to be in life. You will have an experienced pair of footsteps to follow in each day and, more often than not, you can take up extensive short-cuts through the words of wisdom given by these individuals to help get to your destination much more efficiently than having to learn the hard way. With the help of someone who has been in your shoes and who reached success, you have the opportunity to learn from these individuals the lessons they had to learn the hard way, or lessons passed down to them from THEIR mentors or role models. It is, essentially, one of the most valuable things you can do to get from point A to point B, and beyond. We always have to remember and keep in mind that there is truly no such thing as a self-made man. And those who think they can and will do it solely on their own will have an almost impossible journey to succumb to. Regardless of whether the influence of another human being was studied up close and personal by physically being around the person and having access to direct communication with them in this point in time, or whether the method used to learn was indirect and from afar through studying autobiographies, latest research, articles, books, TV appearances, magazines, interviews, etc. done with that person, you are still being ‘mentored’ from afar as you are basing your own experiences off this other individual’s present, past and future practices and experiences. Who better to learn from than those people who have been in your position and who understand what you are going through and what you WILL go through in the future? If you are still in disbelief about this fact, I want you to ask yourself how you went through each stage of life growing up… Did you really depend on no one to teach you how to say and write the alphabet? Who taught you how to ride your first two-wheeler? How did you learn the English language and how did you later pass chemistry? And of your talent playing the piano? What about how you want to raise your own children? You see; we live through life learning through others examples, experiences and words. It’s no mistake that this method has helped us get to where we are right now and that it will continue to help us grow in the future. We all have had inspiration to help us grow, and we have all had to depend on others in some fashion or degree to help get us there. With that said and done, is it no wonder that discontinuing this proven method would be foolish? When you get right down to it, this is something we have ALL proven effective and we can ALL attest that it works… So why stop now?
In my life everyday, I am always encouraging those around me to reach out and grasp the hands of those they look up to and those who are willing to help (and I am telling you… you will very, very rarely, if EVER, find an unwilling hand if you are genuine and stand by your good intentions and inquiries). Meeting good people and holding on to good people are two key things to aspire to do on a daily basis. I, for one, know I wouldn’t be in this exact moment right now had I not tried to reach out to the people I met and immediately looked up to. The greatest successes of my life so far I can dedicate to the many individuals who helped me to see to the ‘impossible’ and who raised the bar so I could fly higher. I always, always advocate this to those around me and will continue to do so for however long I am granted this amazing opportunity to help have an impact on the people I meet as I climb my own ladders, steps and pillars.
Just this past week, while talking with a co-worker about this very subject, I expressed my complete admiration for a world-renowned fitness, wellness and health professional that I have invested a great deal of time into studying over the course of my career who has had a tremendous impact on me as a professional without even knowing it. I went on and on about this admiration until she stopped me and said, “So… Have you contacted him to tell him this?”, and I completely stopped in my tracks. “No.” I said, and right then I had a really strange and inspiring epiphany that I hadn’t even thought of prior. Here I was advocating to everyone around me about reaching out and staying in contact with the people they admire most and I wasn’t even fully living my own example. Granted, the people I have personally met and reached out to I have stuck by like glue and I will continue to do so for the duration of my life and career, but what about the people you admire that you don’t have the convenience of meeting on a daily basis? How do you possibly connect with someone who seems as out of reach and up the chain as Spiderman himself? I thought to myself, “Is it possible that I am putting a limitation on myself with something that may be so seemingly simple to achieve?”… “Hmm… Where’s the loophole?”.
That night, I wrote my own role model a long message via internet expressing my admiration, my epiphany, and how delighted I would be to meet him if the opportunity could ever (even in the slightest) be possible. Sure enough, the very next day I received a gracious letter in return expressing many thanks, kind comments and a phone number to call since he doesn’t reside in Vegas. Wow. Words to begin a connection through conversation. I couldn’t (and still can’t) describe my excitement regarding the matter and how immensely uncomplicated it was to just simply reach out and, if nothing else, let somebody know how they have influenced you. Rarely will you find someone who isn’t happy to continue to make a greater difference than they have already. Almost always, the people who have gone to the top and beyond realized the point I am making in the article and acted on it. More often than not, these same people who received so much help will also be the first ones to continue following in their mentor’s shoes by helping others who look up to them.
Giving is a precious (and contagious) gift that tends to go full circle in the long run. If you fear taking the chance to reach out thinking you won’t get anywhere, try this thought on for size: In knowing no man is ‘self-made’ and that success breeds success through example, hard work, repetition and so forth, remember that your ‘idols’ have worked so hard to emulate their own idols, and therefore have seen the true value of what ‘giving’ can accomplish. This, in turn, will lead them to continue following the cycle originally led by the people they looked up to, and they will, therefore, be the first ones to take a step down to help you take a step up. It is such a simple concept that I believe we read into a little too much when the answer was already evident to begin with. What do you have to lose when reaching out and what’s the worst that could happen? As I always, always say and will continue to say: Don’t be afraid to try something new or to take a risk. We are given this one amazing life to live to the fullest and to live by being the best we can with what we have. We might not have everything or all the answers, but most of the time we can find someone or a few people who might be able to teach us a thing or two or at least guide us in the right direction to find what it is we are striving for. Life is too short as it is. If you can take a short-cut or two here and there, take advantage of the opportunity and give it back in return when the right time comes along.
One of the greatest benefits of surrounding yourself with the people you admire most, and people who have captured your attention in regards to where they are at in life, is the amazing prospect of learning something new each day. When you are encased in a circle of people who are at or below your level, you have no room to grow and no hopes to aspire to reach. You will never learn how to progress through the different stages of your career and you will never have a willing hand reaching down from above to grasp ahold of you and lift you higher. You will be just as successful as the company you keep.
In my short time here in Las Vegas, I have had the incredible opportunity of reaching out to so many wonderful and inspiring professionals from all over the Valley through working at a few different facilities around the city as well as through my work in Connect To Fitness. Each week, I am being introduced to some of the most awe-inspiring people I have ever had the honor of meeting and I can say without guilt and with complete honesty that the quality of my life has done nothing but improve by the day. When you are constantly encompassed by your dreams, goals and the people who are willing to bring you up past your ‘limitations’, your life as you know it will change immensely… for the better. Get out and strive to meet the people who will help You reach your quality of life, Faithful Reader, and see how rapidly the transformation begins!
In this one life, we are only given a short chance to make a change, a difference and an influence. Let those who inspire you lead you to your goals and aspirations through example and approach and follow them without fear or discontent. In a world where so many people need our help, is it no wonder we should willingly extend our hand to reach out and make the most of our time here together?
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“Very few men are wise by their own counsel, or learned by their own teaching. For he that was only taught by himself had a fool for his master.” –Ben Johnson
“No matter how lofty you are in your department, the responsibility for what your lowliest assistant is doing is yours.” -Bessie Lowland James
“The most important single influence in the life of a person is another person... who is worthy of emulation.” -Paul D. Shafer
“I think it's an honor to be a role model to one person or maybe more than that. If you are given a chance to be a role model, I think you should always take it because you can influence a person's life in a positive light, and that's what I want to do. That's what it's all about.” –Tiger Woods
Monday, September 7, 2009
Always Looking Up
“Why the long face?”, I asked the guest walking into the fitness facility who was looking down and who also appeared distraught.
To this, the guest sighed and replied, “Well… I had to work today (…pause… looking at me as if this explains everything…), THEN I realized I forgot my sneakers and had to go ALL the way home (…another pause… waiting for the world to pause in astonishment and pity…), THEN when I went home to get my sneakers I got talked into picking up my daughter from her tennis lesson (…pause… the Earth shatters into a million pieces…), THEN after I picked her up I had to go ALL the way BACK home to drop her off before coming to the gym (…one last pause… waiting for my reaction…).”
Throughout the duration of this conversation, I couldn’t help but NOT feel pity or sympathy for this person after being informed of the ‘misfortunes’ they had experienced. Now, before you question where this is going and ask “Why?” I felt this way; I want to share with you another event that happened on the same exact day…
I was just leaving the gym and I noticed in passing a middle-aged man sitting on the lat-pulldown machine who smiled and waved at me in my hurried frenzy to leave and get going with the rest of my day. Being in ‘the zone’, I almost didn’t see him, but had managed to look up just in time after turning off my IPOD. I stopped mid-stride, waved back, and walked over to greet him.
“Hi! How are you?”, I asked as I reached my hand out to shake his.
As I got closer and right before he answered, I realized this man was wheelchair-bound and disabled (and very likely completely paralyzed) from the waist down.
“I am doing just wonderful, my dear,” he exclaimed, “as it is always a great day when you wake up and realize you are alive!”
Right at this moment I thought to myself, ‘Why is it that the consensus I am being exposed to appears to be that the people who have the most to be grateful for are the ones who always have their chins down, while so many of the most inspirational people I meet are in dispositions that not many people could endure?’.
Now, I’m not stereotyping everyone as I have seen first-hand the exact opposite scenario happen as well. I guess just having gone through one extreme to the next within such a short time-frame with two totally different people in two entirely different ‘predicaments’, it had caused my cranium to consider this thought and to think about how often we all come in contact with similar situations on a daily basis.
Think back on the last occasion where you made acquaintances with numerous people in one day or at one time, and think about the responses you received from each person you introduced yourself to or reacquainted yourself with. What were the most common responses to your acknowledgement and how did the energy of each person affect you, personally?
In my own experiences, I have found that addressing individuals with a pessimistic outlook tend to subconsciously rub off to a certain degree. You might not be in a bad mood, necessarily, after talking with this person, but negativity can definitely try pretty hard to chip away at positive energy. The same can be said in communicating with a person who appears to be on top of the world. Contact with them is generally infectious as well and they are able to influence optimism to those around them. I can tell you right now, that the day I came in contact with those two individuals, I experienced this phenomenon to the fullest. Not to say the individual expressing their ‘problems’ at work brought me down, but I did find myself thinking negative thoughts about why he isn’t grateful for all he DOES have. Especially after meeting such a delightful man that same day who (in my opinion) had way more reasons to frown then most people I know, yet he was wearing the biggest smile I had seen all day… and he had given me one as well. Imagine that! We can actually induce others with feelings that reflect our emotions just simply by giving a negative response through our body language and responses to others. Powerful thought, huh?
While sitting and having a fantastic meeting with a great friend (who just also happens to be an amazing professional in the healthcare industry), Lifan Hung, she brought up an awesome ‘exercise’ that we should all think about trying. For the sake of this article, I am going to call it ‘Always Looking Up’…
For an ENTIRE day… I dare you to greet EVERY single person you come in contact by saying something positive. Even if your whole day has been based around mishaps and calamity and you feel so stressed that you can hardly contain yourself, and regardless of how the person on the other end responds… Just breathe… smile… and say something infectiously positive to each person you see for that day. I can absolutely guarantee you that not only will you make another person’s day more worthwhile, but you will also create and embellish a strong, empowering, and positive affirmation within yourself as well. Just try it. Just for a day and be cognizant of how you feel and how others you interact with react to your optimism. It might just be so infectious that you decide to use it everyday!
Just as well, when I was around ages 15-16, I can remember a time when I was headed into a convenience store. Walking to the door, I heard footsteps behind me, so I opened the doors in front of me, turned, and held them open for the individual who was a few steps behind me. Surprised, the man stopped for a moment, hesitated, and said, “Oh!... Well… thanks!”. He then continued forward and into the store. Following behind, I grabbed what I was looking for and (ironically) was now standing behind the same man I had held the door for in line. After he checked out and left, I checked out myself and headed to the door where it was opened from the outside. Caught off guard and putting my spare change in my purse, it was my turn to pause at this unexpected gesture.
Walking through the doors and looking up, I saw the familiar face of a man returning a favor peer out and as I treaded forward, he kindly said, “I wanted to ‘thank-you’ for your kindness earlier.”
“Why is that?”, I asked, confused.
To which he said, “I have been really down lately… and I mean REALLY down. And no one has given me the time of day. I don’t know why I’m telling you this,” he said under his breath, “but today it got to the point where I wanted to end my life. Thank you for helping me remember how good it feels to smile.”
Speechless, I said, “You’re welcome.”, and with a tip of his hat he walked away… with his chin held high.
To say this event didn’t change my life would be an absolute lie. I never really told anyone about this incident as it just didn’t feel appropriate until now. After that moment and to this day, I take careful prominence in making sure to say ‘Hello’ to (most) anyone I encounter and to be as friendly as possible to the people around me. You just never know what your actions might mean to someone. Each person has a unique story and each person, as an individual, is dealing with specific problems, issues and stresses that affect each person to a different degree. Never judge a book by its cover and never underestimate or take for granted the power of spoken word. You have no idea what each person you encounter on a daily basis is going through behind closed doors, and what a kind comment or acknowledgement might do to make someone’s day better… or their life.
I dare you, Faithful Reader, to set all worries, stresses, ‘problems’ and issues aside and devote an entire day to optimism. The more you speak of positivity, the more you will act on it and the more you will infect those around you with the same kindness you exert yourself. Don’t be one of those people who allows a leaky faucet ruin their day. Instead, look at the things that you are grateful for. Stop and smell the roses and notice the little things in life that bring a smile to your face. Learn that the glass is always full… but only if we let it be. Remember that ‘perception is reality’ and that by changing your thoughts, you can change all that surrounds you.
And lastly, oh lastly, don’t ever wait for perfection, but praise and commend progress. By appreciating the small steps leading to the big result, you can gain a better appreciation and understanding of yourself and your life in a way that someone being handed something will never be able to identify with. By changing your thoughts, you can change your life… or someone else’s.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.” -Bob Hope
“Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day.” -Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” -Plato
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo Buscaglia
“To give and then not feel that one has given is the very best of all ways of giving.” -Max Beerbohm
To this, the guest sighed and replied, “Well… I had to work today (…pause… looking at me as if this explains everything…), THEN I realized I forgot my sneakers and had to go ALL the way home (…another pause… waiting for the world to pause in astonishment and pity…), THEN when I went home to get my sneakers I got talked into picking up my daughter from her tennis lesson (…pause… the Earth shatters into a million pieces…), THEN after I picked her up I had to go ALL the way BACK home to drop her off before coming to the gym (…one last pause… waiting for my reaction…).”
Throughout the duration of this conversation, I couldn’t help but NOT feel pity or sympathy for this person after being informed of the ‘misfortunes’ they had experienced. Now, before you question where this is going and ask “Why?” I felt this way; I want to share with you another event that happened on the same exact day…
I was just leaving the gym and I noticed in passing a middle-aged man sitting on the lat-pulldown machine who smiled and waved at me in my hurried frenzy to leave and get going with the rest of my day. Being in ‘the zone’, I almost didn’t see him, but had managed to look up just in time after turning off my IPOD. I stopped mid-stride, waved back, and walked over to greet him.
“Hi! How are you?”, I asked as I reached my hand out to shake his.
As I got closer and right before he answered, I realized this man was wheelchair-bound and disabled (and very likely completely paralyzed) from the waist down.
“I am doing just wonderful, my dear,” he exclaimed, “as it is always a great day when you wake up and realize you are alive!”
Right at this moment I thought to myself, ‘Why is it that the consensus I am being exposed to appears to be that the people who have the most to be grateful for are the ones who always have their chins down, while so many of the most inspirational people I meet are in dispositions that not many people could endure?’.
Now, I’m not stereotyping everyone as I have seen first-hand the exact opposite scenario happen as well. I guess just having gone through one extreme to the next within such a short time-frame with two totally different people in two entirely different ‘predicaments’, it had caused my cranium to consider this thought and to think about how often we all come in contact with similar situations on a daily basis.
Think back on the last occasion where you made acquaintances with numerous people in one day or at one time, and think about the responses you received from each person you introduced yourself to or reacquainted yourself with. What were the most common responses to your acknowledgement and how did the energy of each person affect you, personally?
In my own experiences, I have found that addressing individuals with a pessimistic outlook tend to subconsciously rub off to a certain degree. You might not be in a bad mood, necessarily, after talking with this person, but negativity can definitely try pretty hard to chip away at positive energy. The same can be said in communicating with a person who appears to be on top of the world. Contact with them is generally infectious as well and they are able to influence optimism to those around them. I can tell you right now, that the day I came in contact with those two individuals, I experienced this phenomenon to the fullest. Not to say the individual expressing their ‘problems’ at work brought me down, but I did find myself thinking negative thoughts about why he isn’t grateful for all he DOES have. Especially after meeting such a delightful man that same day who (in my opinion) had way more reasons to frown then most people I know, yet he was wearing the biggest smile I had seen all day… and he had given me one as well. Imagine that! We can actually induce others with feelings that reflect our emotions just simply by giving a negative response through our body language and responses to others. Powerful thought, huh?
While sitting and having a fantastic meeting with a great friend (who just also happens to be an amazing professional in the healthcare industry), Lifan Hung, she brought up an awesome ‘exercise’ that we should all think about trying. For the sake of this article, I am going to call it ‘Always Looking Up’…
For an ENTIRE day… I dare you to greet EVERY single person you come in contact by saying something positive. Even if your whole day has been based around mishaps and calamity and you feel so stressed that you can hardly contain yourself, and regardless of how the person on the other end responds… Just breathe… smile… and say something infectiously positive to each person you see for that day. I can absolutely guarantee you that not only will you make another person’s day more worthwhile, but you will also create and embellish a strong, empowering, and positive affirmation within yourself as well. Just try it. Just for a day and be cognizant of how you feel and how others you interact with react to your optimism. It might just be so infectious that you decide to use it everyday!
Just as well, when I was around ages 15-16, I can remember a time when I was headed into a convenience store. Walking to the door, I heard footsteps behind me, so I opened the doors in front of me, turned, and held them open for the individual who was a few steps behind me. Surprised, the man stopped for a moment, hesitated, and said, “Oh!... Well… thanks!”. He then continued forward and into the store. Following behind, I grabbed what I was looking for and (ironically) was now standing behind the same man I had held the door for in line. After he checked out and left, I checked out myself and headed to the door where it was opened from the outside. Caught off guard and putting my spare change in my purse, it was my turn to pause at this unexpected gesture.
Walking through the doors and looking up, I saw the familiar face of a man returning a favor peer out and as I treaded forward, he kindly said, “I wanted to ‘thank-you’ for your kindness earlier.”
“Why is that?”, I asked, confused.
To which he said, “I have been really down lately… and I mean REALLY down. And no one has given me the time of day. I don’t know why I’m telling you this,” he said under his breath, “but today it got to the point where I wanted to end my life. Thank you for helping me remember how good it feels to smile.”
Speechless, I said, “You’re welcome.”, and with a tip of his hat he walked away… with his chin held high.
To say this event didn’t change my life would be an absolute lie. I never really told anyone about this incident as it just didn’t feel appropriate until now. After that moment and to this day, I take careful prominence in making sure to say ‘Hello’ to (most) anyone I encounter and to be as friendly as possible to the people around me. You just never know what your actions might mean to someone. Each person has a unique story and each person, as an individual, is dealing with specific problems, issues and stresses that affect each person to a different degree. Never judge a book by its cover and never underestimate or take for granted the power of spoken word. You have no idea what each person you encounter on a daily basis is going through behind closed doors, and what a kind comment or acknowledgement might do to make someone’s day better… or their life.
I dare you, Faithful Reader, to set all worries, stresses, ‘problems’ and issues aside and devote an entire day to optimism. The more you speak of positivity, the more you will act on it and the more you will infect those around you with the same kindness you exert yourself. Don’t be one of those people who allows a leaky faucet ruin their day. Instead, look at the things that you are grateful for. Stop and smell the roses and notice the little things in life that bring a smile to your face. Learn that the glass is always full… but only if we let it be. Remember that ‘perception is reality’ and that by changing your thoughts, you can change all that surrounds you.
And lastly, oh lastly, don’t ever wait for perfection, but praise and commend progress. By appreciating the small steps leading to the big result, you can gain a better appreciation and understanding of yourself and your life in a way that someone being handed something will never be able to identify with. By changing your thoughts, you can change your life… or someone else’s.
Until next time, Faithful Reader…
“If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.” -Bob Hope
“Today, give a stranger one of your smiles. It might be the only sunshine he sees all day.” -Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” -Plato
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” -Leo Buscaglia
“To give and then not feel that one has given is the very best of all ways of giving.” -Max Beerbohm
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